Blame, balance and beyond: the cognitive mechanics of “mom guilt” in working mothers

Purpose This study investigates how working mothers’ experiences of guilt under work–family conflict are shaped by locus of control (LOC) orientations. While prior research frames mom guilt primarily as an emotional response or structural outcome, this study examines how cognitive attribution processes frame and sustain guilt under conditions of work–family conflict. Design/methodology/approach Nineteen semi-structured interviews with full-time working mothers in the United States were analyzed using thematic analysis grounded in distributive and gendered justice theories. A second study surveyed 274 full-time employed U.S. mothers to test whether work–family conflict, distributive justice, and LOC orientations were associated with mom guilt. Findings Five themes emerged: guilt as perceived unfairness, self-policing under gendered norms, normalization of unequal workloads, trade-off rationalization, and compensatory over-performance. LOC orientations shifted dynamically, functioning as attributional frames that aligned with and sustained gendered expectations and maternal self-blame. Quantitative results showed that work–family conflict and powerful-others LOC were positively associated with mom guilt, and that perceived household fairness unexpectedly strengthened the conflict–guilt relationship. Originality/value This study reframes maternal guilt as a cognitively framed process rather than solely an emotional or structural response. By integrating qualitative meaning-making with quantitative testing, it identifies LOC and household fairness as key mechanisms shaping how guilt is interpreted and sustained, challenging prevailing assumptions that fairness uniformly buffers emotional strain.