Step-Mother's Model of Identification in Relation to Mourning in the Child

Three models of identification are proposed for the step-mother which might clarify and consequently ease her interactions with her step-children. These are: (1) “primary” mother, (2) “other” mother, and (3) “friend.” Selection among these could be made on the basis of the child's mourning of his biological mother. If the child's mourning is incomplete and his mother is still psychologically alive to him, then the role of “friend,” model (3), seems to have advantages. But if the child's mourning of his biological mother is complete, i.e., she is psychologically dead for him, then the step-mother's adopting model (1), “primary” mother, seems to fit the needs of the situation. Model (2), “other” mother, does not appear to have advantages over other models under any circumstances considered.