The Origins of Emotional Pain

The authors present an integrative model of emotional pain derived from their practice with AEDP (Fosha, 2000). The model is centered around 3 different types of pain: core emotional pain; relational pain, and self pain. The authors show how each pain originates from 3 different innate fears and how triggering the emotional memory of such pain is central in psychological suffering. They argue that correct conceptualization is essential to work with the right transformational process, as healing is achieved for each type of emotional pain by 3 corresponding distinct processes. 1. For transforming core emotional pain: regulation of emotion by undoing aloneness and processing emotions and action tendencies to completion. 2. For transforming relational pain: validation of needs and promoting connection through expression and reception. 3. For transforming self pain: undoing shame by compassion and the re-assessment and integration of parts that were disowned as unworthy. The authors argue that patients generally have all 3 kinds of pain, and an ongoing conceptualization can be very helpful to identify what kind of pain is active in the session, to understand what healing process is required at each moment.